Archive for January, 2006

Best Laugh

January 31, 2006

Today, one of the nuns who volunteers at the school was left behind by her ride. She used to teach science at the school and is in her 80s now. Being that I wanted to get away from work for a while, I offered to give her a ride back to the motherhouse. As always, I had NPR on the radio and they were talking about the State of the Union Address tonight…

“Are you going to watch the speech tonight?”

“No, Sister…probably not. Are you?”

“Well, I doubt that there’s going to be much else on, so I’ll probably have to watch it.”

“Oh.”

“Besides…I want to know what kind of lies he’s going to tell about Iraq and everything else.”

First I snickered a little…then I bust out laughing. That just made my day.

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Packages of Joy

January 31, 2006


We have been slacking here at RoD! And the packages and gifts for the party have been arriving. We are opening them one by one.

In the duration, please be sure to visit Rat Boy now and again on Fridays and view the prizes of beef that Grishaxxx serves up over there!

The Cake Has Arrived!

January 31, 2006

Blue Girl has outdone herself again!

PupH., get your snout out of the bottom tier, please!

Happy Blog-a-versary!

January 31, 2006


Ratboy is one today and that means naked pool party at RoD! It’s a birthday fiesta. Round up the cowboys!

Everybody into the pool. We expect more illicit behaviors then the Running of the Bulls 2005/3Bulls! Gone Wild.

Boys, wet banana hammock party starts at 4 PM.

Girls, no tops in the hot tub. Naked boxing tryouts are at 2 PM sharp.

PupH: Extra Chopin and no, repeat, NO Cuba Libres! (We miss Gregor and man will he be sad about missing the shin dig)!

UC: Sweet Pea, please make sure the Village People are blaring and the shrimp is on the barbie. Please do not serve us any of your bottle caps or that horrible hot and sour soup that is pure toxic evil in a bowl.

Res Publica: Get your bolus full of junk on the dance floor because we miss you godammit!

Blue Girl is baking the cake and if we are extra lucky, Sean S. and Brian-the-cobag will not be jumping out of the cake but the lovely and talented Uma will for Lance M. to get all jiggy with her.

Happy Birthday Madame Rouge

January 30, 2006

Rumor has it that someone is having a birthday! Cue the music and let the boys march in…

Sexually Frigid

January 30, 2006

A trip to Amazon.com found this doughy pantload of Jonah Goldberg like comments:

Not happy, September 25, 2003

Reviewer: A reader (Note that the frigid couple cannot even make up a fake name).

After having done a fair amount of research on Amazon, this book was described in such a way that made it sound like a tasteful, discreet, yet informative book.
Having now received the book, we are appalled at the explicit photographic content, the immoral suggestions (threesomes) and the base language used to describe what we see as a beautiful, God-given act of marriage. (WWJD = Who Would Jesus Do?)

At no time did Amazon lead us to think that this book was as explicit as it is. The description of the book given by Amazon is as follows: “Over 170 Unique Sexual Positions. Medical diagrams guide you to the Incredible G-Spot. The Orchestration of Sensual Foreplay. Oral Lovemaking Techniques. Fully indexed for easy reference”. There was no reference to explicit photographs. “Medical diagrams” also leads one to believe that the book is more tasteful in nature than it is. And nowhere does it mention the inclusion of threesomes.

As a husband and wife, we were merely looking for informative guidance to improving our already satisfactory sex-life. We were bitterly disappointed with the results.
(If being frigid is satisfactory, then they get an A).

Why is it that folks like 15 A and rightards with computers have the need to share their obvious mental illness with the rest of the world?

Pop renaissance

January 30, 2006


This is for Pop Ren. He has pneumonia and we want him to get better soon!

New Medicare Prescription Plan

January 30, 2006


A friend sent this via email:

Date: Mon, 9 Jan 2006 12:41:07 -0500

Bush explains Medicare drug bill.

WOMAN IN AUDIENCE: “I don’t really understand. How is the new plan going to fix the problem?”

BUSHWAD: (Verbatim Response)

“Because the –all which is on the table begins to address the big cost drivers. For example, how benefits are calculated, for example, is on the table. Whether or not benefits rise based upon wage increases or price increases. There’s a series of parts of the formula that are being considered. And when you couple that, those different cost drivers, affecting those — changing those with personal accounts, the idea is to get what has been promised more likely to be — or closer delivered to that has been promised. Does that make any sense to you? It’s kind of muddled. Look, there’s a series of things that cause the — like, for example, benefits are calculated based upon the increase of wages, as opposed to the increase of prices. Some have suggested that we calculate — the benefits will rise based upon inflation, supposed to wage increases. There is a reform that would help solve the red if that were put into effect. In other words, how fast benefits grow, how fast the promised benefits grow, if those — if that growth is affected, it will help on the red.”

People Who Annoy Adorable Girlfriend

January 27, 2006

Dork in seat 15 A.

Yes, let’s begin by starting with the fact that First Class was not available. Fine. We can deal with this. However, 15 A needed a beating. 15 A started innocent enough with “well, we have a middle seat open.” The writing on the wall becomes clear when he shares his entire ordeal of getting a pace maker in February 2005. Note, AG did not ask about this. Fine. We are dealing. However, when he gets up on the soap box and goes off about the fact that the country is messed up because the minority are running it, now we got a problem. How does he come to this conclusion? The following deductions:

1. No prayer in schools.
2. You cannot call it a Christmas tree.
3. Jews put up all their stuff, but no nativity set.
4. Independants must declare a party to vote in primaries.
5. All politicians are crooks.
6. His dad, who was a police officer, would have been put in jail with all the bad people if he committed a crime, but politicians get a ‘country club jail cell’.
7. All Americans don’t want abortion.

You will be glad to know that AG did not fight with this guy. AG is learning to take the high road. Instead of expecting others to be better, AG is setting the tone by being better herself. AG stuck her nose in her Wall Street Journal and ignored him. Of good note, AG learned he has no children and he’s moving out of state. (This will help AG sleep better tonight).

Do you think he’s related to Canuck from Chuckles site? The ‘let’s make up facts, distort truths and push our agenda’ cult strikes OUT again!

A Bush Beating

January 27, 2006

Friday guffaw over at Brando’s place. Checking Jenna’s room for the Abramoff tape was the best!

That was good stuff, B.!