Fun With Searches: Wherein Neddie Jingo Makes Res Publica Laugh So Hard He Cries.

Today, someone found this blog by doing a yahoo search for the phrase “become a lesbian you have to” (which – surprise! – leads one to a post by our own Adorable Girlfriend).
As a public service announcement, let me just state for the record that although the official policy of the Republic is to affirm and support becoming a lesbian if you want to, you actually don’t have to.  It’s totally up to you.  Anyway, moving right along.

Apropos of confused and pathetic searches for things you probably really shouldn’t depend on the internet for, check out this post by Neddie Jingo at (conveniently enough) By Neddie Jingo!  You’ll laugh so hard it will hurt.  But it will hurt so good, I assure you.

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17 Responses to “Fun With Searches: Wherein Neddie Jingo Makes Res Publica Laugh So Hard He Cries.”

  1. blue girl Says:

    If anyone cares, I am more responsible for this post than Res is — and slightly less responsible for it than Jeddie Ningo — and much, much less responsible for it than Penis Pump Man.

    Res is just trying to get ALLLLLL the glory ALLLLLL the live long day.

    A gravatar is graphic that represents the commenter on weblogs. Duh!

  2. Robust McManlyPants Says:

    The best search phrase that has ever brought anyone to my blog is still “virginia slim 120s, tranny,” which I concluded was either someone looking for images of a very specific fetish or someone issuing the harshest possible reply to “I’m going to the store, need anything?”

    Though today I did get “how can Jane Eyre be seen as anti-feminist,” and no part of that makes any sense in relation to my little corner of the webbertrons.

  3. Res Publica Says:

    Yes, it’s true, Blue gave me the tip about Neddie’s post. And I kept it so secret that you would never, ever know that!! Unless you read the comments in the previous post!!! oooh!

    Robust: It’s amazing how bad the results are from non-google search engines. In relation to the searcher’s question, it depends on if she or he means “Jane Eyre the character” or “Jane Eyre the novel”. If the former, the answer is “Jane Eyre can be seen as antifeminist because she didn’t hook up with Bertha Mason”. If the latter, the answer is “Jane Eyre can be seen as a antifeminist because…well…Bertha Mason”. If it’s a DailyKos fundraiser, Jane and Bertha will be featured naked, smearing pies all over each other while Markos masturbates.

    How about THEM apples?

  4. blue girl Says:

    Ok. Now I see the green cartoon man!

    He loves me.

  5. Rex Kramer, Danger Seeker Says:

    I susepct that “become a lesbian you have to” is either a) an example of the “Engrish” language that permeates Japanes B-movie subtitles, or, B) a sign of our crumbling public schools’ attempts to teach proper English.

    Clearly, the searcher was looking for the line “You have to become a lesbian,” which, as everyone knows, appeared in the 1979 ABC After School Special, “Lesbians: Locker Room Predators.”

    I’m not sure, but I think Kristie McNichols starred in that one.

  6. Adorable Girlfriend Says:

    Man, I miss the afterschool specials.

  7. blue girl Says:

    Me too, AG. Although I do have to admit. I never got the whole Kristie McNichol thing though.

  8. Res Publica Says:

    I’m trying to finish up a grant that has to go out tomorrow, so I may not be around much today. Just FYI.

  9. blue girl Says:

    How will I ever survive the day?

  10. Res Publica Says:

    If I give you the finger now, will that tide you over until this evening?

  11. blue girl Says:

    There’s an interesting phenomena that I’ve noticed over here at this Jim Thome Bolus of Junk Weblog — and that is this.

    Basiclally, like 3 out of 672 people who comment on a post actually refer to the specific post in question. The remaining 669 just ramble on and on about DRAMA and The Hotness of Chuckles and Bad Food Presentation and Emu Haters and other such cobagitation.

    So, my question is —

    Should all RoD Weblog Bloggers start imitating Atrios and just Open Thread it all the time?

    Seems like it would be a lot easier on ya’ll.

    🙂

  12. Res Publica Says:

    Maybe people who live in off-topic houses shouldn’t throw Thomes stones.

    blue girl Edit Link May 23rd, 2006 at 8:47 pm

    Ok. Now I see the green cartoon man!

    He loves me.

    blue girl Edit Link May 24th, 2006 at 6:29 am

    Me too, AG. Although I do have to admit. I never got the whole Kristie McNichol thing though.

    blue girl Edit Link May 24th, 2006 at 7:42 am

    How will I ever survive the day?

  13. Adorable Girlfriend Says:

    OK, kids. When we all learn that this is just a joint like NYC, where anything goes, it will make more sense. It’s like Res wants AG to write about stuff other than hating and AG just wants Midniter to write and you all just want Res to show you his bolus of junk. See, anything goes!

    Now back away from the blog, put down the bong and get jiggy with it!

  14. Res Publica Says:

    The Presidential Bolus is reserved for the First Boyfriend.

    And Teh. And possibly Chuckles, if I can get him wasted.

  15. blue girl Says:

    Ok, Res. You could have copied and pasted waaaayyyyy funnier comments than that.

    I think you are losing your fast ball!

    Don’t drink the bong water!

  16. Res Publica Says:

    I was just reaching for those of your numerous off-off-topic comments that were closest at hand. And weed is for babies, losers. I can’t be wasting my valuable meth-time on that!

  17. Res Publica Says:

    I’m not able to access 3 Bulls…..is Pinko sharing a cell with James Wolcott at Gitmo or what?

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